Cocooon of Chaos

Lovely, lovely gratitudes

Things I love and are grateful for:

Aviary photo editor fun here at Typepad...so awesome! Well worth the long wait!

forts made my the mister (from thrifted chenille bedspread, no less!)

rain for a Saturday without sports shuffling so the said mister could build this fort!

breakfast with my mum

thrifting with my mum and finding oh so many treasures

spontaneous, last minute date afternoon and evening with the mister

tie shopping and cocktails at Greenland Cafe with the mister

crummy movie watching with the mister, watching the rain fall...we watched Young Adult, which was really, really disappointing

terrible Mexican food take out, but happy that no matter how bad the food or how drenched our clothes, we still have a blast together after all this time

sleeping 7 blissful uninterrupted hours of sleep

the Celtics...I've stayed up way too late recently watching them, but my goodness, they are awesome

watching the Celtics with Ava, all snuggled up in bed, our smiles matching at excitement, hope, and anticipation for the game. I've loved this team since I was a little girl and seeing my girl with the same excitement is priceless. Ava looked over at me and said, "Mummy, I just can't explain it, I get so full of happiness in my heart when I watch this team"....my thoughts exactly, my sweet girl

stopping at Tendercrop Farm, loading up on grass fed, local meat but more importantly, watching my sweet Lillian bottle feed a piglet and hold a baby chick. I don't think she's come down off that high yet...

after 5 weeks of being gluten free, I'm grateful for feeling healthy again...I miss warm baguettes and hearty pasta so very much, but living pain-free is fantastic

deciding that rather than spending the time "catching up" on facebook, I'll be catching up in real life...facebook and I are taking a break for a bit. Facebook friends, please comment here, in the comment form, as I will not be checking facebook for a bit. Need to live off of the timeline, and in real time, if you know what I mean

and lastly, one of the highlights of this weekend was celebrating a very special someone's birthday...

my lovely sister. Words cannot express how proud I am to have such a smart, beautiful, dedicated, and loving sister. Nevermind how lucky my children are to have such a great aunt!

Are things perfect right now? Goodness no...but I think if things were ever perfect, much like this week of full rain, the sunshine would never feel so good. May you find your own glimmers of sunshine throughout the week and I hope your weekend was divine!

 

 

When theory becomes reality...

So, I've spent the past two or three weeks pounding the books for a research review for school. It has been a true labor of love, let me tell you. I'm starting to wonder if my children will only remember me with my nose stuck in a book or typing away at this light box...

What may you ask am I delving into? I am drowning myself in research regarding urban schools, specifically urban middle schools.  Oh, the inspiration and defeat in the research is astounding. More importantly, however is the real experience I've had with my own urban kids. Of the many hats I wear, for me, being a tutor was the most rewarding.  I had a group of kids who were just wonderful.  At the end of our time, they all, in their own way thanked me. One of the most heartfelt was from my toughest 16 year old. He gave me a hug and later sent me a text saying, "thanks for believing in me because now I beleive in me." Yes, really and truly.

I'll be honest, I started tutoring for the extra money. I had grave reservations going into these kids' neighborhoods, as they were not the best.  But, I reasoned that these kids, too, deserve a chance, no matter what their zip code. Let me tell you, the neighborhoods were not that bad and although the extra money was helpful, I'd do this again for free in a heart beat.  These kids let me in and as much as they said I helped them, they helped me.  They helped me refine my passions, abandon my fears, and just go for it. As much as I want to make a difference in kids' lives, I've realized they have the same potential to change mine.

Happy weekending!

Presently...

enjoying the new things in our yard from seed sprouts to new swing sets!

reveling in a major thrift score...a blue suitcase with lavendar silk interior to add to my minor obsession with vintage suitcases

ever so slowly purging, donating, and organizing this chaos...living in 1200 square feet in an old house with few closets constantly poses a challenge.

This week will be spent immersed in research for school but am truly amazed at the remarkable teachers out there making a difference. My thesis is on Urban Education and I happened upon the below link. This little cocoon is my space of who I am, so from now and then, posts may be peppered where my true passion lies...

 

May your week be filled with sunshine...

Library Basket: When the story hits home....

image here, "Ghost Wings" by Barbara M. Joose

Oliver's new favorite task at the library is to re-shelve certain areas. Well, this past week he picked the J shelf and really went to town. So, as we were putting each book back, I happened upon this one. I stopped in my tracks because it was one of my favorite illustrators and I have a mild obsession with monarch butterflies. (Title of this little blog, friends?!) Anyhoo, it is my dream to go to Oaxaca, Mexico someday and see the millions of monarchs in the forest, soaking up the glorious sun before making their arduous migration. Well, this gem of a book explains how this phenomenon relates to a young girl in Oaxaca whom recently lost her best friend, her grandmother. Upon opening the book, I decided to read it to Lillian at the library, but as the story began, tears choked my voice and I promised to finish when we got home. Let me tell you, I'm so glad I stopped. I decided to wait until Ava got home because I know she, too, would find great solace in this book. So, I grabbed my hankie and sat down to read with my girls. We were a beautiful mess.

The author combines the scientific fact of the monarch migration and the spiritual beliefs of the Mexican people in such a way, I'm teary just thinking about it now.  She explains some believe the monarchs carry the souls of the departed and come down on the magical days of Los Dias de los Muertos to be with their earthly loved ones to celebrate. I should explain something here: my very first blog post was about Los Dias de los Muertos and a little excerpt from that post to explain why this book meant so much to us just a few days ago:

On a personal level, last summer I lost twins. It was a devastating blow for our family and my husband and I were left in a state of confusion. We were unclear how to function as partners, parents, and grieving individuals. It was a dark, hurtful time in our lives but our compassionate four year old summed it up best when she was explaining it to one of her dolls, "Mummy's babies were very sick and had to go heaven. They turned into butterflies and flew up in the sky. But, they still come to eat the flowers and be with us." Ava resolved such a complicated issue and it is through her simplicity and grace that I was able to pick myself up and move on.

I've never, ever forgotten that conversation my sweet girl had with her dolls. The innocent words of a four year old pulled me out of such a deep, dark pit of grief...then, and now.

 I am not going to lie. Grief sucks. For the past month, I've been up and down, depending on the day. I miss my Nana so very much. She was more than my Nana, she was one of my best friends. I saw her every week and she dispensed advise I wanted to hear and didn't want to hear, she understood me when I didn't understand myself, she knew my kids better than I did, she was honest about everything and never held back, and she was my sweet indulgence. Mothering is a pretty self less gig and being a mother of 7 boys, she knew this better than anyone. During our weekly visits, she never let me get up, make my own tea, get my own piece of cake, or take my own children to the bathroom.  Even though I was still a mother in my thirties, I never stopped being her granddaughter.  

That being said, this book tore at my heart strings because I could not only identify with the little girl's loss, but could marvel at the simple beauty of finding spiritual meaning in Nature.  I kid you not, after we read this book, we were playing in our yard and counted 20 (yes, 20!) butterflies. No, they were not monarchs, but regardless, the message was heard.  I will always be her granddaughter and so many of her wonderful traits are carried within the hearts of my children.  All of this from a picture book...when we are open, the right things enter our lives.  I could have easily closed that book because it was too much, but I didn't. I'm so very, very, very glad I didn't. My days are indeed brighter, my friends.

And, as always, I must be honest here. I hesitated with this post. Is it too personal? Is it too much? But, then, after having the mister read it and seeing him cry, too, I know that it was too personal and it was too much, but, it is our life. And life is not full of joyful sing songy moments, it is peppered with heart-wrenching ones, too; after all, how could we ever appreciate the good ones without the bad? A million thanks, my friends, my family, and the superb mister for always being there to read my scribbling....

In our Backyard

All of this rain has left us a little stir crazy in the Grant abode so, we put on our wellies, grabbed the camera and headed outside in the misty afternoon. What wonders we found...

Snails, mushrooms, puddles, flowers, baby spiders, and a little history lesson about the infamous Salem Witch Trials all on an afternoon walk...so much goodness right outside our door.  

Simple Amusements: Super Hero in Seconds

What you need:

one child, ready for super hero transformation

old t-shirt

sharp scissors or pinking shears

optional: super cool Batman under-roos 

What you do:

In our case, first up was teaching Oliver the old Batman theme song...but, that is optional...

cut shirt along seams, to fit your super hero

using the arms, tie around neck (not too tight!)

fly around the room, "rescuing peoples" (Oliver's addition)

I'm assuming you all have common sense here and will not make the cape too long as to trip over and hence, choke your child...

Voila! Super hero in a second! No, I'm not claiming this is just my idea--actually, it was Devin's and a million parents before me--but just a little reminder that we all need to let loose and let some super hero run around in his undies saving peoples.  Happy Wednesday, everyone!

Mother's Day...

It's Tuesday night and I still feel like I'm stepping off of Cloud 9. What a wonderful weekend, really and truly. To start, my dad surprised me with playoff Celtics tickets for a Saturday night--win win: date night with the mister and Celtics! Woo hoo! From a very young age, I've been a Celtics fan and let me tell you, there is NOTHING like being in the Garden (the old or new) when everyone is up in their seats screaming...wonderfully electric! Thanks to my sweet husband who kept it all a secret and my cousin who stepped in and dared put all 3 kids to bed on a Saturday night. It was an amazing way to start the weekend. And then, there was Sunday...

Admittedly, I may have had one too many gin and tonics at the game on Saturday night, so my weary head slept until 9 a.m. Something that has not happened probably in eight years. Wow, it was nothing short of wonderful! Moved from the bed to the couch with my 3 littles all cuddled up and watched an entire, uninterrupted episode of Sunday Morning. Bliss again! And then, that husband of mine made me something wonderful. He compiled a little movie of the kids, from infancy to now, that utterly shook me to the core. I'm not sure I've ever cried so many tears of joy in my life...seriously. The soundtrack composed of two of my favorite songs: this one from Iron and Wine and this one from Bon Iver. Looking at all three of my children, in all their individual and collective glory, was just the best gift ever.  Devin, you finally surprised me, baby...and it was well worth the wait.

After all the crying, there was some more, I must be honest.  Devin included a picture of my Nana and I logged onto Facebook to find another one of my other Nana...

both women who are so dearly missed, especially on the days when I think of the amazing women that came before me and exemplified what motherhood is all about.  Both women had so many children, so little time, so little resources but never lacked love, dedication or selflessness.  They are my heroes and I wish more than anything in the world to make one more batch of tollhouse cookies with Christine or hit up one more church rummage sale with Velma.  Words fall short to express how much I miss them.  And, clearly, style runs in my veins...check out the boots on my Nana!  And then...

I had some time with own Mum and all that sadness vanished. We went to see the Best Exotic Marigold Hotel and I beg of you to go see that movie. Fantastic, moving, funny...wonderful. As we were munching popcorn, I looked over at my mum and remembered that not too long ago, we were not sure how many Mother's Day we'd have together. One thing I've learned from my mother is with hard work, anything is possible, even beating cancer. I am a very lucky lady to have you as my mum and best friend, Mum.

So, yes, as life always is, this weekend was filled with joy, sadness, and endless amounts of love. Okay, must run and rinse the color out of my hair...the above picture inspired a new cut and color. (More on that later!) I hope all of you mums out there had a magical weekend, too!

Guest Interview: Oliver

Favorite Color: Pink

Favorite Food: Pasta

Favorite Toy: Balls

Favorite Sport: Skateboard, like Daddy

Favorite Show: Yo Gabba Gabba, specifically this one, with Mos Def

Favorite Place to Go: Bank...get lollipops and football store (a.k.a. Modell's)

Favorite Book: Richard Scary's Cars and Things that Go

All done, Mummy...need to go play babies with sisters

 

 

 

Guest Interview: Ava

Favorite Color: Eggplant

Favorite Food: Chinese food

Favorite Book: Abigail Adams 

Favorite Movie: tie between Chimpanzee and Dolphin Tale

Favorite Song: Dynamite

Favorite Sport: field hockey and basketball

What do you want to be when you grow up? Horseback rider, vet, teacher, or whale biologist

If you could go anywhere in the world, where would it be? Gombi to see the chimps in the wild

If you could be any animal what would you be and why? chimp because they can play all day

Where do you want to live when you grow up? Gombi

What kind of car do you want to drive? cheetah van

One thing you love about yourself? I'm a great writer

One thing you wish you could change about yourself? my anger issues

One thing you want to learn before going to third grade? subtraction

What is one thing you want people to know about you? that I like to write, I love chimps, Jane Goodall, and I am a vegetarian because I don't like animals being killed

 

 

Guest Interview: Lillian

So, these last couple of rainy days has left us indoors, cuddling with books, doing puzzles, and a whole of chatting. I love chatting with my kids...well, okay, kids in general. There are so unabashedly honest about so many things, still love themselves, and are open to great discussions. Now, I think my kids are pretty great collectively and individually, so I just wanted to show a small window into their cute greatness! First up, Lillian, a.k.a. Pippalotta Marie....

Favorite Color: Orange

Favorite Food: Pizza

Favorite Book: Little PInk Pup

Favorite Movie: Peter Pan

Favorite Song: Safe and Sound by Taylor Swift

Favorite Sport: Soccer

What do you want to be when you grow up? teacher and a farmer

If you could go anywhere in the world, where would it be? Paris

If you could be any animal what would it be and why? Pig because they're cute

Where do you want to live when you grow up? Beverly

What kind of car do you want to drive? a white van

One thing you love about yourself? that I'm good

One thing you wish you could change about yourself? I wish I could do a handstand

One thing you want to learn before going to first grade? nothing...I'm ready already

What is one thing you want people to know about you? that I'm good, smart, and want 5 pigs